craziest drunk story...

Acid's a trip.

I don't drink anymore to the point where I'm flat out passed out, but I was at a party in Seattle a few years ago sometime in November. Was mixing acid and meth while drinking heavily. I was sweating alot so I was taking off my jacket. But I guess I took off more than that because I blacked out and found myself standing in front of some stranger's yard with only my boxers on at 3am in the morning. I was freezing my @ss off when I realized what was going on, then the sprinklers went off.

All this makes me think back to my first New Years Eve bender. Whole bunch of recently graduated kids hanging out at this party, none of us know anything about mixing drinks or anything but there was Rum, Vodka, Tequila, Root Beer and Butterscotch Schnapps, and I was mixing the craziest all alcohol concoctions and my 16 yr old cousin kept taking them and drinking them. At one point in the evening I was sitting outside under a tree 'cooling off' when he pops out 'McGirk, I'm DruuuuUUUUuuunk!' Later my best friend let's a blond he was trying to mack on drive his new truck, and my cousin hops along too, and kept trying to cop a feel. Funny thing is, I wake up first, and see him in bed with a fat chick with a mustache. I sat around waiting for people to wake up, and he comes out and asks me, 'Did I do it?' That is just funny!

alright, truth is I have a story too. It was a halloween party. My husband and I and our neighbors went to a dance. Lynn's husband and I ended up getting majorly smashed and were dancing on the tables. Had a great time at the time but the next day when the hangover occured.I actually quit drinking for 10 years! I will never forget that one

Michigan has a lot of festivals, and one year I attended an Ox Festival. In the beer tent they served ox sandwiches and pitchers of Labatt Blue. My friends Wolf and Lumpy road with me. Lump was lighting up a little weed in the beer tent, and I was drinking three quarters of each pitcher that came to the table. My other friend Ferk lived three houses down from the event, and I recall stumbling to his house, watching them play some Tribes, about three seconds of the ride home (Wolf being the least drunk became the DD). Wolf was also kind enough to take me home, despite it being an hour out of his way. I sat in the back for some reason. He's traveling 55 mph on his way to dropping me off, when the dome light kicks on, he starts looking around and sees me hanging out the back door blowing ox chunks. He helps me into my house, my girlfriend at the time yells at him, he tells her to get bent, leaves. She's still mad so she asks me his number so she can yell at him more. 20 numbers called at 3 in the morning later, she get's the right one. She starts to bitch, he unplugs his phone, and I thank him to this day for dropping me off. I also broke up with the bitch.

I have one for u all. It was in my high school yrs and My friends and I were having a lil' gathering at her house. We were drinking straight rye and the vodka i've never since been able to find called "black death" and the last thing I remember was finishing my final drink and I blakced out. apparently i tried to walk on fire and take off for a walk all by myself. Yeah that was crazy. Then her mom came home and I have no idea how i got into bed but I had a bucket in my face and i vaguely remember her mom saying to her daughter. " i think there's someone dead in ur bed". man did i feel rough that morning. Then my friends had the brilliant idea of smoking a spliff 1st thing in the morning. I felt like a bag of smashed #ssholes.

Some phrases just tickles my funnybone, like 'bag of smashed assholes' that is just funny!

yeah i love using it. I heard it from one of my friends and I had to start using it. i laughed hard!

If someone looked bad I'd tell them they looked like pressed shit.

that's too funny. can i use that one too?

I've got no problem with that.

craziest drunk story...

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